In September 1786, after ten years
in the Weimar civil service, when his fortieth birthday was coming into view,
Goethe was gripped by the fear that he was wasting his life. He was weary of
the cold winters, the endless meetings, and the workload that made it hard to
find time for writing. He headed for Italy – first to Vicenza and Venice, where
he was especially impressed by the buildings of Andrea Palladio. Then he went
to Rome, which was his main base. He spent nearly two years in Italy.
He had a
very Classical idea of the point of travel. The outer journey was intended to
support an inner journey towards maturity. He felt that there was a part of
himself that could only be discovered in Italy – ‘I am longing for grapes and
figs.’ But like many visitors to Rome, when he got there he felt disappointed.
In a collection of poems he wrote about his experience – The Roman Elegies – he
describes how the great city seemed to be filled with lifeless ruins that were
famous but didn’t actually mean anything to him: ‘Speak to me, you stones!’ he
pleads.
It’s a feeling many later visitors have had. He realized that what he
needed was not a more elaborate guidebook, but the right person to have an
affair with – someone who would share their love of Rome with him and show him
the real meaning of the place. In a poem, he describes the woman he meets – he
calls her Faustina. They spend lazy afternoons in bed; she’s not a great
intellectual; she tells him about her life, about the buildings she passes on
her way to the market – the Pantheon, a baroque church designed by Bernini –
which she hadn’t realized were famous; they were just the buildings that
happened to be around, that she happened to like.
In his bedroom next to
Faustina, Goethe realizes that he’s entering into the spirit of Classical
culture: a simple, comfortable relationship to sex and beauty; and the idea
that the Classical poets were people like him. For Goethe, the point of travel
isn’t relaxation or just taking a break from routine. He’s got a bigger goal in
mind: the aim of travel is to go to a place where we can find the missing
ingredient of our own maturity. Goethe didn’t stay in Italy. After nearly two
years, he had developed enough to go back to Weimar and get on with his
political and creative work.